Floggers....and Paddles....and Whips....
OH MY!!!

When is Pain NOT Pain?

Most vanilla people just don't understand the appeal of pain.  As humans we're conditioned to avoid pain.  Pain is not good.  Pain hurts.  Pain leaves booboo's and oowies  on your body.   Pain is Baaaaad. (or so they say!)

Think about it a moment.  Have you ever had session of incredibly intense, "headboard banging, light fixture shaking" sex and afterwards notice some whopping big bite marks on your neck?  You don't remember how you got them do you? It's simple, your lover bit you hard enough that it left a bruise but all you felt was a jolt of pleasure.  If they had bitten you that hard when you were cooking dinner, you would have screamed in pain and hit them on the head with a skillet. (I know I would!)  However, when you're sexually aroused your pain tolerance level shoots up and the stimulation you would normally feel as pain, is now actually pleasurable.

One explanation why this happens is that the brain produces endorphins (the body's natural "happy pill") to compensate for pain.  Endorphins are good things.  Endorphins are what help pregnant women endure childbirth.  The "runner's high" long distance runners experience is well documented and described as a floating sensation. Some people experience a similar feeling when they eat chili peppers. It's a rush, a light headed feeling. All of this is what makes it enjoyable for some people to receive a spanking or flogging and enjoy it. The endorphins kick in and they float in a nice little world all their own. It's not pain, it's pleasure. 

Another thing to consider is that pain is a continuum. There are many different kinds of sensations that you can use in your lovemaking. From light scratches with  your fingernails to open-hand spankings. There are many many ways to touch someone, and all of them can be enjoyable.  Different people enjoy different levels of sensation; what may be a wonderfully sensual caress to one person may be practically unnoticeable to another, and what may be a delightful flogging to one person may be no fun AT ALL to someone else. The secret is to finding the happy medium.

Some people consider all of this absurd. "How could you WANT pain?" The best answer anyone can give is that some people simply seem to be wired differently. They want more sensation; they find the intensity thrilling and exciting, whereas someone else might find it overpowering and agonizing. People like different amounts of spice in their food; why not in their sexual encounters?