I came into this relationship quite a different person than I am today. My previous experience had been a learning experience for both of us.. it was with Someone who demanded quite a bit of hmmm... "protocol".. titles, a bit of humiliation thrown in occasionally.. now, while some subs enjoy and thrive on this.. I am not that type of person. When I am pushed, I push back. Very simple.. it is an automatic reaction.It was not that I did not want to be submissive, but that when put in terms of "You have to"... well, it was difficult, at best.
I then met Dr. Wicked, after realizing I would and could go no farther in my previous relationship.. there was too much anger, and I did not like my own behavior nor my reactions. When introducing myself to Him, I advised Him of my feelings.. He nodded quietly, His eyes sparkling, a smile on His face.
Our first night together... was.. hmmmm....... unusual, at best.. unusual in it's normalcy, in my opinion.
I was waiting for.. "on your knees".. something.. ANYTHING.. but nothing happened. The most I got was, "Take off your clothes, and start the hot tub".. said in a conversational tone, which I obeyed before realizing I did so.
~ ~ things proceeded in this matter, over the course of a few weeks.. until, gradually, after realizing the other shoe was NOT going to drop.. I began to relax. ~ ~
