carm's dungeon

 

Spanking Safety Tips

This article is copyright 2001 by the author, all rights reserved. Send inquiries to carmb@bad-candy.com.

If you've found a very yummy bum to spank/whip/flog/etc., or you have a yummy bum that's going to get spanked/whipped/flogged/etc., here are a few short safety tips to keep both you and your lover safe from harm.

1) Know which parts of the body are safe to hit. There are some parts of the body that you should avoid spanking at all times. Hitting these parts of the body can result in extensive, and sometimes fatal damage.

Kidneys: The kidneys are located behind the muscles of the back in the area between the bottom of the ribcage and the top of the ass (where the crack starts). DO NOT spank anywhere in this area or you could damage your lover's kidneys.

Tailbone: The tailbone is located at the base of the spine, a short ways down the crack of the bum. It not only hurts to be hit on the tailbone, it can be cracked or broken, which is an extremely painful experience.

Hips: The sides of the bum and along the bony part of the hips. There are several nerves running along here and it would be best to avoid damaging them.

Spine: The spine has several small bones in it that could be cracked or bruised.

Neck: The neck is a very sensitive area, and at no time should it be hit. There are many major arteries, tendons, glands, and lymph nodes, not to mention the larynx.

Face: Damage to the eyes is pretty much guarenteed to be permanent. Damage on the face could be very painful not only physically, but mentally. It's best to avoid the face entirely to avoid any unnecessary damage.

Ears: Hitting someone on the ears can cause permanent damage to their hearing. There are also delicate parts inside the ear that are associated with the body's sense of balance.

2) Use a safe word or safe signal. A safe word is established so that the action can be stopped instantly should anything go wrong. Before play, choose a word that is unlikely to normally be said during your play session, such as "ocean" or "red light". It should be agreed that the safe word will only be used in serious situations, and at all times the action will stop immediately if it is said by either party. A safe signal is used in situations where a word cannot be spoken, such as when the submissive is gagged or is wearing a hood. Sometimes you could use a specific series of grunts, or it may be possible to hang on tightly to a bell and dropping it would be the safe signal. If for any reason a safe word gets used during your play session, stop the session immediately and remove any restraints, gags, hoods, etc., and find out why the safe word was used. Sometimes it's best to take a time out and discuss just what went wrong. You might decide to continue with the play after the problem's been solved, or you might decide to continue the play another time.

3) Only spank or be spanked in a relationship of absolute trust. In a trusting relationship, it is possible for either partner to stop the action, regardless of their reason, at any time with the use of a safe word or safe signal. A dominant should trust that the submissive will use the safe word if things are going too far. As well, a dominant should be alert to their submissive's reactions, and willing to stop the action if they suspect things are not going as they should. Sometimes submissive's are hesitant to use their safe words, but in some cases you could find yourself in a situation where they can't use the safe word. The dominant must be on the look out for danger signals because the person being spanked often loses the ability to know when things are going too far.

4) Establish hard limits before play. It is best to dicuss limits with your lover before you start playing. A hard limit is an activity that you designate as off-limits. For spankings, a limit may be necessary due to a physical problem, such as an old injury. There could also be mental reasons for not hitting specific parts of the body. Some people would say that having limits creates a situation where true BDSM cannot be practiced. The truth of the matter is that everyone has limits that must be respected in order to preserve their well being, and the relationship. Some people have limits due to phobias or past abuse, and for their mental safety, these limits should always be respected. For those that are in a 24/7 Dom/sub relationship, it will be the dominant that decides whether the established limits should be pushed. A good dominant would not push limits without a great amount of care and consideration for the well being of his/her submissive. Discuss limits with your partner and use your common sense.

5) Leather butt: This is a condition created by damaging the nerves and skin on a certain part of the body, often the butt. It can result in toughened skin, scar tissue, and desensitization. The biggest culprit in this department appears to be paddles. Beating a person's bottom with a large flat heavy instrument day in and day out is bound to cause problems over time. Vary your spanking techniques, try different types of implements, and spank different parts of the body. Fans of very very very heavy frequent spankings will probably encounter this problem with time.

For futher information on safety, I would reccommend safer BDSM.

For further information for beginners, try the Vanilla Spanking Forum.

I hope you've found these tips helpful, and please feel free to email me at orlan@gurlmail.com with any comments or questions.