The Garden of Lord Koi and lily
bdsm Resources

Total Power Exchange

A Disclaimer

This article was written by lily with help by her loving Sir, Lord Koi. The views in this article as always are of Lord Koi and lily and their sources. Before writing this topic, I have done a bit of research on the web of Total Power Exchange articles written by people involved in the process. I implore you to look at their articles if you are interested in involving yourself in Total Power Exchange. I refer to the Dominant as He and the slave as she.

A Simple Definition

Total Power Exchange (TPE) involves one person taking complete consensual control over another person. It is a journey that takes a lifetime to achieve. It is a rare sub-sect of the BDSM lifestyle. Total Power Exchange slaves are often defined as closest to the original meaning of slavery (poenkitten, latches website). The Total Power Exchange's couple is a rare breed. The Dominant's word is LAW and there are usually no contracts.

So what happens in this relationship?

TPE is a world of total control. A TPE slave's day is micromanaged and has little control over anything. They usually own nothing and have little money for themselves. The Dominant decides everything. What the submissive wears, does, and how she acts. Since there are no contracts it is hard to talk about breaking up and staying together.

Slaves can leave if they choose to. For true TPE it is a lifetime commitment to a Master. Masters and slaves go into this knowing lifetime.

Most TPE relationships have in common

I generalize here to give you a picture. I have met both male slaves and female slaves involved in TPE. Many in the bdsm lifestyle, much less the outside world, have little understanding on how TPE is achieved.

Most TPE slaves are intelligent, obiedent and do a true Power Exchange. A true Power Exchange meaning the slave reliquishes hold over her life. Outside of this relationship, people may be surprised that they are submissive.

Most TPE Masters are completely devoted to their slaves. There is a deep love and bond between the Master and slave. To see it in action is a thing of beauty. From the outside most see the couple as adoring and devoted to each other. TPE emphasizes D/s over sadomasochism. Play can be involved and is often involved but TPE is Dominant submissive always.

Common TPE rules (by missy in Our Victorian BDSM Life)
Tpe is Lifelong commitment
The slave cannot leave the relationship
There is no contract
There are no rules
There is no safeword
There are no negotiations or known limits

- Some of these are scary to achieve. Lord Koi in our beginning stages of TPE have found the need for rules, but soon those will be erased and just known as laws in the household for me. We are growing into each other and we prefer safewords and negoiations right now. Our TPE is a slow journey and it is the journey that matters to us.

My personal journey by lily

When Lord Koi and I talked about bdsm we knew already we were a loving couple engaged to be married. The more we read the more we got into the lifestyle the more we realized TPE was right for us. Our journey is slow. I am right now only in training. I want a long training period so I can shed off my skins of resitance to Him and come to Him being only HIS. When I get collared in June as his TPE slave I understand all these factors. I will shed my safeword and he will understand and love me and know my limits.

Some worthy sites

Our Victorian BDSM Life - Leo and missy discuss very relavent, very loving terms about their journey and descriptions about TPE
Latches website - submissives discussing TPE and their views from the Bottom

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